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Re-sensitized

“You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.

- Matthew 5:13

Life lacks a certain saltiness these days. Quarantine offered a kind of heightened awareness at first, whether out of fear of what it held or out of hope for what it could bring. But at this point life is likely bland, tasteless, sense-less.

We’ve lost our saltiness. More accurately we’ve been de-sensitized to the taste of salt. Life itself has not made much sense for me as I’ve many times lost all sense for what time it is or even what day. I’ve fumbled my way through infrequent social interactions because I’m so socially and emotionally distant from myself.

Most of my days are spent in sensory overload as the kids pierce my ears, my work occupies my eyes and my hopes for life post quarantine teases my imagination. Whatever is left of my senses at the end of the day I finish off with food, drink, TV or anything that may add just a little salt to my life.


This is even worse for anyone living a traumatizing environment whose senses are heightened for survival, and who’ve had to shut off parts of themselves to keep from being completely flooded. If you find yourself in an environment where you are being traumatized or traumatizing others, you are not alone. Reach out to someone who can offer support. Make time to find a counselor or spiritual director. If you’re lost on ideas, let me know. I’d be happy to connect with you.

“You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.

There is so much I want to say, but I’ll leave it at this: You will be made salty again, but you must also let your life become tasteless. Tastelessness is the prerequisite for salt, disorientation is the prelude to discovery, and the cross leads unknowingly to resurrection. Most of our suffering and the suffering we inflict on others is due to our belief that tastelessness is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot. So we avoid it and trample others underfoot instead, only to find ourselves stuck in shame, then guilt, maybe repentance, rinse and repeat.


The cycle is broken when you let your life become tasteless, de-sensed, and this cycle must be broken many times. A truly salty life is not one that has found extravagant flavor, but one that has grown at ease with how it tastes.

If there is good news in the midst of this pandemic, it is this: Your life has become tasteless, it seems good for nothing except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot. Great! Now you have something that can be made salty again.


In the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.


Amen


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